My love/hate relationship with social media

My love/hate relationship with social media

As I travel a lot, if not constantly, my first connection with people is thru Social Media. Friends you leave behind will follow me on Facebook and followers, subscribers and visitors are anxious to see my next move or discovery, and some even my next article (those who subscribed to the email-updates: thank you, thank you, thank you)

I love my blog, I love social media and I had no problem putting my life out there in the open, since nobody seemed to have a problem reading and watching it. Yet times change, and I am a bit whimsical about my social media usage. Facebook is not what it was with the new algorithms as is Instagram, my two mayor accounts for daily updates. Youtube is a world on its own with troubles of its own and I swing from like to dislike once again.

Many of us use social media. Yet at the moment I travel through a country where in some parts there is not even internet available and many people have an old skool phone (meaning: no smartphone).

More and more users are horrified at the trolls with their hate-filled, anonymous, nasty comments

All over the internet people seem to like the idea of getting an anonymous account and spill their crabby shit.
And those who genuinely like to read about other people seem to disappear in the background under the rule of bored, morbid people that drain all energy out of the social media usage.

This social media thing used to be pretty neat and a lot of positive things still come from social media.
Social media helps Leaving Holland grow, and a lot of visitors come through social media. So maybe I should love social media, but I do not (always) and here is why:

  • social media is free, but my time is not, people think they can ask me all kinds of questions and are never clicking in that donate button, and when at a complex question, or a demand for personal guidance or counseling,  I share my hourly rate, I never hear from them again.
  • social media seems to take over our daily life. So many people in the gym, on the beach in the restaurants and at family gatherings are only staring at their smartphones. It took over mine. I was one of those that checked social media before going to sleep, when I wake up and even in the middle of the night when I had to pee. Not anymore. Nowadays my stats and advertisement graphs are more interesting to me (since nobody hits that donate button or is willing to pay me I have to use advertisement)
  • social media used  to sooth my curiosity, i can check in a split second where my friends are and what they are up to, Facebook even tries to help me with that by reporting friends nearby. And at lonely nightly hotel hours, social media helps me to pass time.  I try not to do that anymore but it is addictive I must say.
  • social media seems to trigger people to copy ideas, they roam the internet for inspiration and copy what they like so much that it is almost one on one the same, I hate that. I spent a lot of time just thinking. Pondering on new plans and ideas. It drains me to come up with new ideas that are to be copied in a flash by some sucker that can not come up with his own ideas.
  • social media allows people to steal your content. I saw my photos showing up as header photos on Facebook. Believe me. It is crazy, and when I confronted the person, it was denied that is was my picture, but is was mine, it even had that tiny speck of dust on it that was on my lens that day I took the picture. I tag all my photos now. But that is so much more work. And even written content gets stolen. There is no protection for creative content, there is only good behaviour, and we all know what that mean to a bunch of people out there.

There is the growing concern about the wide spread of incorrect and fake news

People not paying me for my services look elsewhere on the internet for answers. And that is becoming a trend. Even I do it. Google algorithms have a structure that serves our need for free answers. But who is there to watch what you are reading is the truth?

When I prepared for my departure from the Netherlands I found so much outdated intel on how to handle the bureaucracy , visa-application and even flight information that it was scary. And even now, clickbait is overwhelming and feeding us a lot of bullshit.

I see expats in the Philippines use clickbait titles to attract visitors to their blog and YouTube Channel

There is a saying that emotions attract visitors and I once wrote an article about writing a catchy title for your social media. But the key word in writing a good title is “authentic”. Your title should cover your content. Using a title that has nothing to do with the content is a new trend, and I low it. When you come up with a catchy title, your content should be accordingly.

Many expat YouTubers use titles as: You never believe what happened to me on Bohol…..and than they just were on a trip, and nothing happened, not even a bug in the room so to speak. Or a title: what does travel in the Philippines cost? That should be a generic video on travel costs, not on your personal spendings on one trip.

And I read comments of people subscribed to those channels that send a shiver up my spine. And in this video I tell you why:



Some changes on my website and YouTube Channel are being made. Comments are off on Youtube, and here on the website only to be made through Facebook, this way you moderate yourself. Because your interaction will show up for all your friends to see.

At the moment, if I could, I would not use social media anymore. Because of the trolls, the copycats and the ‘mister know it all and you know nothing woman’-attitude. But I know that will pass again, it always has. And I know that many more followers than those few, do like what they see, and they keep me going.

And my curiousity of what you all are up to 🙂




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