Nomads and friendship, love and sex

Nomads and friendship, love and sex

I’ve written articles about the nomad lifestyle. Why you should or should not start a life like mine. The pro’s and con’s of being always on the move and living out of a suitcase.

I think for me the hardest one is the ‘always being a stranger’ and ‘no one committing to you because you leave anyway’ is the hardest parts of a nomadic life.

I’m not a 24 year old backpacker fucking my way across the planet, in no need for personal contact and companionship. With all due respect and without passing any judgement.
I’m a 55 year old woman with a romantic view on love and sex. Combine that with the knowledge of knowing I’m an old soul, and my dating-habits and relationship-goals are a bit different from general, it is hard to find love on the road.

And no, I do not want to be judgemental here, I would love to be in my twenties again: live carefree and with my whole future ahead of me.
I’ve had my fair share of experiments and one night stands only to come to the conclusion that it is not a thing I can get used to.

In the era of digital friendships it is easy to stay in touch with those you care about. I skype and use Facebook Messenger to contact those I met on my travels and I chose to stay in touch with.
I love my conversations with them dearly and we do joke around a lot, but we also talk about problems like loneliness, love and relationships, children, finance etc.

Conversations you also can have with a partner or a lover

I miss out on that part, so I talk to friends all over the world and participate in their lives by using Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. That is the easy part of my live as a nomad.

When it comes to deeper relationships, sex and a monogamous partner, I think it is all about choices or luck.

They do exist:

  • nomads that fall in love with each other and travel the world together.
  • nomads falling in love with this person that has a great desire to travel and work their relationship out along the way

There are also nomads and female travellers that enjoy vacation loves. Just a couple of weeks of passion on the beach with a great guy and than move on again.

And than there are nomads that have to choose between their passionate travel or passionate love

In my Solo Female travellers group on Facebook I started the topic on love and travel, just to hear some other opinions in these matters.

For me, I had this Filipino guy pursuing me big time before backing out right after he told me he loved me.
No reason given. And although he hurt my feelings, I cannot blame him.
He is not willing to travel, his personal live makes that impossible. He even asked me if I did have to travel, which implies that he asked me to stay, or consider it.

And I told him straight away I could not promise him to stay on forever. And in the end I think there was to big a difference between his world and mine for ‘us’ to be a success.
Although I would have loved to give it a try, I even considered stay put for a while and see how things worked out. Actually, he was the first guy in over 6 years that made me want to change my life for him. For I do realise I’m very lonely sometimes and no relationship comes from not investing.
Him backing out before hand without explanation, gave me 2 options on how to look back on the whole rough emotional month:

  • Either he had been lying to me from day one or
  • something happened that made him change his mind

And than there is a third option: not to think about it anymore, accept it for what it is and move on

The easy way out.
That is the best part of nomad life I guess, when the ground gets to hot to walk, you just pack and leave.

Although I haven’t moved yet, I’m still around, and he is also, as a friend, or something like that. I work wth him some days for a project I took on. And I still like to hang out with him.

But the whole butterfly encounter made me realise that I need someone. I want someone. I like to be one of those travellers that can say: yeah, we ran into each other and it is fun, and now we travel together.
Or: now we live together.

But most important: we share together.

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2 thoughts on “Nomads and friendship, love and sex

  1. This article is interesting since I’m a home-based worker but loves to travel as well but since I already have a family of my own and we both share same interest working remotely to escape hassle of traveling to work everyday since traffic now here is really worst so I guess being a digital nomad is really fun as you can work while traveling but finding love is the hard part. I hope this might help you find that someone who shares same passion as you.

  2. Hi Hannah, first of all: I removed the link, the link attached to your name is advertisement enough.:-) thanks for commenting. I do not believe in finding a soulmate while travelling, that would be even more hard than finding a soulmate in daily life. You have to connect on so many more levels than people that stay put. Travel-plans and wishes to name the biggest. But also work and projects.

    Anyway, since I’m no longer a nomad and not associating with that anymore (see my blog ) and since I’m a very happy single (again) the website might be usefull to others, thanks for sharing! Good luck!